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De mythe van zelfhulp
Hoofden vol met theorieën, filosofieën, psychologiën, ideologieën, geen ruimte voor de leegte. Een nieuw paradigma waar wij gewoon mogen zijn. Verdriet, vreugde, liefde en pijn. Waarom zouden we het ene belangrijker maken? Waarom die eeuwige zoektocht naar zelfverbetering? Op de vlucht voor imperfectie. Worden we echt beter? Of voeden we het zelf alleen maar met meer pijn van de afscheiding: het lijden van het menszijn. Zijn we niet gewoon collectief op de vlucht in een zoektocht naar geluk? Sla je newsfeed open en zie hier; al die mensen beloven je: Het perfecte lichaam Een beter leven Gouden bergen Blijf vooral streven naar zelfverbetering vanuit de overtuiging dat we allen niet…
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Social distancing: perpetuating the madness of a broken system
Over the last few days I have posted a few articles on my timeline. People started to get either: – Mad – Worried Or agreeing, but anyways I haven’t taken the time to explain my own opinion behind the articles. Mostly because I didn’t have time, also because I needed my thoughts and feelings to simmer a bit more. But here it goes: The problem with social distancing The problem with social distancing is that its trying to protect a system that was already rotten And in this attempt, its hurting the very people that were already affected negatively by the rottenness of our system in the first place. – …
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The big question: What are you going to do with your life?
Whenever I have invested a lot of time and energy in something and it ends, I go through a wild range of emotions that often seem very hard to navigate. The question of everyone around me: ” What are you going to do next”? Isn’t really helping with this, but I do realize at the same time, those questions really shouldn’t matter to how I feel. It just adds a bit of pressure to the questions I am already asking myself. What are you going to do next? And why is it so hard to be in the space of not-knowing, resting, emptying? This nothingness feels scary and I immediately…
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Achieve posttraumatic growth by challenging catastropical thinking
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Healing the motherwound: a generational approach
The relationship with my mother has always been a very complicated one. As a child I adored her, as a teenager I hated her and throughout adolescence we struggled in finding our way back to eachother. A journey that didnt come without any struggles. The mother-wound It took me a while to figure out that the difficulties I had with my mother, were actually quite common. I recently came across a term that describes this phenomenom quite well and is known as: the mother wound. The motherwound is something that is caused because of the circumstances women have found themselves in throughout centuries. It is a direct result of the oppression…
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The battle between light and dark
How often did I reach the point of total darkness? Not a pitch black night really, but more like misty clouds on a rainy day. Beautiful but melancholic in nature. As if a black pit has taken up a permanent space in my heart and is slowly infecting the rest of my system. Everything seems futile in this state. Trying to control the blackness tires me, I have taken up this battle a million times before and every time it wears me out. Every time I get on that surfboard again, I feel a bit more tired. A bit more weary. Everything seems futile except for her, for she is…
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Reaching out
A few days ago, I heard that my bestest friend, aka my soulmate, has passed away. After an extensive search for a week, the people who are looking for him, concluded that he must be in heaven now. In the stars, or whatever you want to call it. My. heart. stopped. beating. for. a. split. second. Panic! Memories of the last 2,5 years, flooding into my present. Threathening to almost drown me with their intensity. I. dont. want. to. go. through. this. again. Not the black hole please, I just came out of it a few months ago. I am finally thriving again. Not now! I need you still. You…
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Find what feels good
Those who are familiar with Yoga with Adriene probably already know the slogan: “Find what feels good”. I have been practicing her yogaclass on and off since I became pregnant, enjoying her sense of humour and approach. While I liked the idea of getting to know what what feels good, I dont think I fully understood what she meant by that. But lately this particular phrase starts to sink in and I finally feel like I can grasp the meaning of it. It speaks all about selflove and being kind to yourself. Living life for myself I have been working with a coach for a few months now and she…
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The art of now
I was just about to write about how I am getting there! How I am feeling like I am getting the hang of this single parenting thing. That I am growing more and more into the person I think I am. But just as I was going to write that down, I realised how its not about getting there, but more about being here. (yes a cliche, I know) So, I am here now, the woman of my dreams. It’s me and I am super happy to be her. There is no one to become, the very thought of becoming something else that I am now sounds a bit weird…
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Spiritual bypassing
Get it out!